Friday, June 15, 2012

Broken Hearts

Yesterday, I was sitting at work and Dustin walked in.  I was working and talking to him for a minute and he asked, "TT did someone die in this house and lots of blood" 

I was taken aback and said, "Um no why?"

He replied he wanted to know cause of the rumors.  I asked what rumors and he was like, "The ones that they were talking about."

I was so confused so we talked for a bit and I told him no, nobody had died in our home.  As I said that I realized he was asking because Jana had been looking at a home before she looked at this one and someone had been murdered in that home in Riverton.  Right when I realized that and as I was about to tell him he said, "Someone died in my house".

Sick.  Literally, I wanted to puke, my stomach dropped and tears came to my eyes.

I was still working and it took me back.  I know it was only seconds but it felt like hours as I thought about how I was going to respong to that.  When I got my composure I replied, "You are right Roo and I loved that person very much!  I love your dad."

Breaks.  My.  Heart!

I can see the pain in his face.  I feel the pain in my heart and know his is 10 times worse.

I have been sad and a bit gloomy ever since.  These kids are too little to be facing the pain that comes from death of a parent, especially due to suicide.

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