Wednesday, May 30, 2012

First time ever...ER twice in 1 day!

I was in the er again last night.

Man alive the pain was some of the worse I have ever felt.  At times I was praying to pass out so I wouldn't continue to feel it.

Ben took me back to the ER when I told him I HAD to there was no other choice.  He dragged his feet a little.  He hates ERs.  He hates that they never can fix the problem, only the symptoms.  Me, however, last night, I NEEDED those symptoms fixed. 

We walked in, the nurse immediately took me back for stats.  She then put me in a wheelchair and they waited for the room they were putting me in to be cleaned.  As soon as it was clean, I was put in the room.  I had a nurse there waiting for me.  The doctor was in just a few minutes later.  It was rather fast how it all went down.

The nurse doing the IV missed my vein and was in there wiggling the needle and lead around.  My stomach was cramping and she was telling me, "Just breathe...otherwise the veins will constrict".  Well DUH the reason I am here is cause I can't breathe cause the pain is so bad!

In the end, some morphine relieved me of my pain and I am so grateful!  They still don't know why I was having such horrid cramps.  It could just be because I have had an Intussusception before.  Who knows.  I am just grateful I didn't have another and I was able to be relieved of the pain!

Now I just need to take a couple days R&R and get better and life with hopefully be back on track!

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

A week of unplanned

More unplanned adventures occurred today when I suddenly got the flu.  SUPER Sick :(  Ended up with extreme pain in my stomach region.  Went to the ER via ambulance after calling my neighbor who is a nurse.  She came and saw me and was like, "um 911 is needed".

Low White Blood Cell count - AGAIN!

I don't know why that makes my stomach feel like it is going to explode and take my lungs with it!  OUCH!  Spent 5 hours in the er and might be in there again if the pain doesn't go away again.

The above pictures are from my hospital room.  I was supposed to be getting an IV, instead I ended up giving my blood...enough that it went all the way up into the bag and started to fill the bag!  Oh joy.

They made me hang out at the hospital for a LONG time due to low blood pressure and low white blood cell count.  I just keep praying that I can start feeling better.  I feel like CRAP right now.

Last night at this time, I just had a little headache but that was it.  By 10 pm I had the full on flu.  How does it hit soooooo fast?

Well this little set back just made my work week shorter and not as much money :(.  It also created a few bills that were completely unplanned!

Monday, May 28, 2012

Days never go as planned!

The day started out pretty calm.  We had a couple errands to run and that was it.

It all changed and went down hill FAST from there.  I took Katy over to my parents for her to ride with them to Duschene to put flowers on my grandma and grandpas' graves.  When I got home and went to pull back in the driveway - oil and LOTS of it was in the exact place my car had been parked.  You could see a trail of oil following where I had pulled out to take Katy to my parents.


All plans of errands went on hold when I got out and confirmed what my stomach and heart were telling me.  The oil filter sensor had given out completely and it was leaking oil EVERYwhere.  UGH!

I called Ben out and he sadly agreed we would just have to bite the bullet and go get the stuff to fix the car.  We loaded up in the truck and drove down to the local O'reillys.  $100 later we had the parts and supplies and headed back home.

A couple hours later, a long walk to get some exercise and parts, some rain storms and miscellaneous other stuff later...the car was fixed.  No more leaking oil.

A couple hours?  Why yes.  That couple hours was due to us trying to pull the trailblazer into the garage to work while a huge spring rain storm came in.  We couldn't get the trailblazer to drive up on the ramps (afterwards we realized it was because it is rear-wheel drive unless we put it in fou wheel...I needed to change the 4x4 settings to get it on the ramps).  Anyway, it was cold and raining and no way we could get it to work so the trailblazer stayed out on the driveway, we closed the hood and garage door and that was the end of working on that for about 2 1/2 hours.  I went in the house, did the dishes and worked inside some.  I also got the help I needed to get the closet downstairs working (yes I did part of the work...I just needed help with some because some of it was a 2 man/woman job)!

We finally got the part fixed after a 4 mile walk; HOWEVER, the battery to the trailblazer was DEAD!  Completely DEAD!  Oh the joys!  We know the battery is not good.  We have just hoped to get by a little longer.  We don't have money to replace it (we didn't have money to buy these NECESSARY replacement parts).  After about 5 minutes of it being hooked up to the truck, we got the trailblazer running.  Still no leak.  YAY!  Ben did an awesome job fixing it!

I pulled the trailblazer out of the driveway long enough to repark the truck and I turned it off!  DOH!  Well we got to hook the truck and trailblazer back up and waste gas for another 5 or so minutes while we jumped it again.

I got out of the car, moved the truck back in the driveway and well, the trailblazers doors locked.  The keys were locked in the car (I am claiming no fault of my own).  Oh the joys!  We left it running there on the curb for about 25 minutes...just wasting gas.  We couldn't turn it off and we were covered in dirt, grime and oil.  YAY for wasted gas :(  Here is a pictures of just some of the oil that spilled just from turning on and off the trailblazer that few times until the car was fixed!  Also that trail that leads into the garage...ya lovely!  Hello to trying some home remedies for oil removal!

We loaded up the trailblazer and got ready to head out the door to meet my sister and get Katy (this was at about 8 at night) and Ben ran into the kitchen to grab a drink.  All the cups were currently in the dishwasher so Ben opened the dishwasher door and I heard him yell, "WHY IS THE DISHWASHER FULL OF WATER?"  Oh great!  The load I had started while the car was unworkable due to the rainstorm, well it never fully ran.  The water loaded filled the dishwasher and that was the end :(  We still don't know what is wrong with it.  Tried everything up our sleeves :(  The panel won't light up.  Hand washing for the forseeable future at our house.

Yup - that was our day!

To end on a great note though - our neighbor gave us some top soil to finish filling in our front flower bed.  We still need more but at least that is a start!  We also checked on our garden that my dad helped me fill with dirt and guess what!  We have a tomato!!!

During the rain storm, I finally got Ben to help me put in the shelf and closet rod in the downstairs bedroom.  I am so grateful we have a working closet in there for more storage now!  Right now it holds my wedding dress and the girls and my blessing gowns :)  as well as some baby gifts. and then our travel luggage is underneath all that.  Once we get the bar in the other basement closet, this closet with just have all our winter coats hanging in it and the closet in the other bedroom with have the wedding gown and such!

Also - the walk I earlier mentioned.  It was GREAT.  We walked 4 miles with Lyse.  She was on her scooter.  We talked, laughed and just enjoyed time together.  I am so GRATEFUL we got that time with Lyse during all the storms (literal and not) we had today!  On a normal day like this, Lyse would have been on her own to entertain herself while we tried to figure it all out.  Instead, that walk gave us time to have one on one time with her.  Talking with just her.  Spending time with just her.  It was the best part of my day! (kinda sad I didn't take any pictures...should have)

So I guess our simple day was eventful filled but it was with all good things.  We have a producing garden, a closet that we have extra storage in, a car that is running and most importantly, Ben and I got one on one time with our Lysee Lou!

Monday, May 21, 2012

What a day, what a day!

I woke up this morning, got my kids off to school and thought to myself, "Today I am going to take it easy cause I have a long work week ahead of me".

So, I went to the dentist and finished my root canal and got a cavity fixed.

Went to home depot with my dad and got some soil (thanks dad) for the garden and a GFCI outlet to try and fix an electrical problem we are having in our home.

Went visiting teach.

Got dinner finished up in the crock pot (yummy Cafe Rio Sweet Pork)

Started cleaning out the garage and building 2 shelves.

Go visiting teaching to another person.

Work on garage more.

Feed family (which I say it that way cause literally I did not get to sit for more than 2 minutes during the meal without someone asking for something or me having to get up to get something).

Work on garage more.

In total, I worked on the garaged for almost 6 hours.  It looks a MILLION times better.  I am not embarrassed to open up the garage door and have neighbors see in now!  YAY!

This last weekend we got our storage shed from my parents.  All the bins that were in it, went into the garage and then most of the yard supplies went into the storage shed.  I say most cause we have a lawn mower that we are trying to fix and a lawn mower that is working and both can't fit in the shed.  We also have my in-laws tiller in the garage that we need to return.  Anyway, those extra bins in the garage did me in.  The garage literal was embarrassing with the way it looked.  I dreaded opening my garage and having my neighbors see what was in there.

I have not been happy with the garage organization since we moved in.  We had 2 shelves but things were just all over.  Tonight I am MUCH happier with the way the garage looks.  Once we fix the one lawn mower and return the in-laws tiller ALL lawn care items will be in the shed.  YAY!  The tools have a much better home on the side rather than in the front of the garage.  I still need more shelves, but that will come with time (and when we have the money).

I found I have WAY too many baby clothes still.  It is time to pass them down.  Not sure I will need any ever again for my own babies.

I LOVE organization.  I CRAVE it.  I have more to work on and do.  Honestly I don't even know WHERE to start with the tools in the garage.  We have WAY too many (of course Ben would feel differently).

My goal is to have a neat, organized garage that is easy to access stored items as well as park cars in (once we get a garage door opener for the cars that is).

I wish every day I could organize.  That would be my dream job - Professional Organizer!

Now for some pics (please's a work in progress!)

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Lawn Ornaments

One thing I am loving about our neighborhood is our lawn ornaments.

They look like this:

Ok 2 of the scooters were at the park which is 4 houses down, but the other 2 are in my backyard.  We have a couple in the front yard as well but I had ZERO desire to walk in front and take more pictures.

I am loving that there are kids everywhere.  My kids go outside and suddenly I see them on a foreign bike or scooter.  I ask where they got it, they reply, "It's Emry's" or "It's Gracie's" or some other name and continue on.  A few minutes later, I see another little neighbor girl riding past on one of the girls scooters.  The swap, trade and play.  Some forget to bring them home at the end of the day so we gain "lawn ornaments".  Other days, they remember and my girls forget and our girls scooters become the lawn ornaments for someone else.

I love that the kids are everywhere out there and that they LOVE it.  I love that there are friends to play with for my girls.  I love that the TV is not the instant "go to" for entertainment anymore.  Now there are friends outside and the girls like to go and play with them.

We truly are where we are supposed to be right now.  I love our area.  I love our home.  I love that my children will get to experience "Summer" this year for the first time in our OWN BACK YARD!  YAY!  I can't express my love and gratitude for that!

Now if I could only figure out how to get my grass back to being GREEN and the morning glory to DIE!  UGH I hate that stuff!

Friday, May 11, 2012

Music for MY soul!



These Guys:

Which in the end equals some of the BEST music you can and will ever hear.  They inspire me.  They uplift me.  If I am feeling down, their music uplifts.  I am so grateful that my Father in Heaven gave these men these talents and inspired them to SHARE.  I am grateful they do share and that I get to hear it!

I am grateful for my hearing and that I am able to hear and feel music.

I hope and pray I can provide music to my children.  I am actively searching for ways to provide music in my children's lives and help them achieve music as a talent, hobby and LOVE!

Here is one of my faves!

Wednesday, May 9, 2012


Today is a new day and a day I can not nor will I even try to focus on pity.

Nothing has changed from yesterday.  It has remained the same.  I am still struggling.  Even more happened last night and I seriously am sick over all of it.

I turned to the scriptures.  Sometimes we just have to find joy where we are.  We have to look past the doom and gloom and find the blessings.

I am struggling with that but I am trying to day. 

I am blessed to have a Savior Jesus Christ.  I know I often let this amazing ally go in favor of gloom and sadness and I am trying to turn to him and have my burdens released to him.  Have faith for a brighter tomorrow.

The future is only as bright as my faith...I know I have a bright future as long as I can keep the faith.

I have prayed for strength.  I have prayed for help.  I tried to get out there yesterday and serve others but I failed in helping like I should have.

Today I am going to try to make up for it.  I am going to do something for someone that will help them and make a difference in how their day goes and I know it will make a difference in how my day does!

I pray for strength and ask for prayers.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Never enough

Times in tears today: 5

Hours feeling overwhelmed: 24

Feeling of discouragement:  completely present!

I haven't felt this discouraged in such a long time.  I know we are in such a better place but it just seems like no matter how hard we try, how careful I budget...I can never make the money go to all the needs.

I am not talking about wants (such as a second car) I am talking about real NEEDS like healthy food in the house, basic bills (water, sewer, electricity, gas) paid.

We haven't had rain in a bit and our grass needs watered.  I don't have a hose that can water my yard nor do I have the money to buy one.  I need a backflow preventer in order to legally run my sprinklers...I don't have the money for that either.  So I am sitting here looking at the grass we worked soooo hard on in the spring DIE from lack of water.

Last week we needed groceries.  It was a choice of groceries or putting money in savings to pay rent/mortgage.  I decided groceries were the more important for right here and now.  Today I am sitting here stressing because now I only have 3 weeks of putting money away to have enough to pay on time.  I know we can have just means other bills have to go unpaid.  Our car was out of gas and we didn't have food.  I had to weigh needs of right now.

Yes I know we went to Cali.  Yes I know it cost some money.  It cost me a total of $100....and it was MUCH needed.  I worked a lot of hours before we went so that I could use the money for that.  I kept everything really really cheap.  I guess I shouldn't have went and then I would have had $100 for groceries.

It just frustrates me that it is ALWAYS that tight.  It has been years since it wasn't that tight.  I HATE it.  I wish I could pay tithing and not be thinking, "Man this would be nice to use for groceries".  Which is a thought that comes many weeks.  We always manage.  Something always happens and we have just enough to squeak by...I know this is because of the blessing of tithing.  I know this happens because we pay our tithing.  I have faith in tithing and that is the reason I always pay it.  It's just hard.

I cleaned and cleaned and cleaned today.  My head hurts, my tooth is killing me.  My house still has more work.  My yard - ugh I will never be able to stay on top of it all.  I haven't started laundry for the week and dread starting it cause I have a million hours of work, dentist appts and everything else this week that I worry about starting the laundry and not being able to really do it.

I am discouraged.  I am overwhelmed.

I know my life is blessed.  I see it daily and I am so grateful for it; however, today I haven't been able to keep my feelings of discouragement at bay.  I told myself, "Don't have a pity party, get to work" so I started working on the things that needed done.  Hoping I could "work through" these feelings.  Instead each thing I worked on I would see 2 or 3 other things that needed help or work and I just don't have time and money to fix it all.

My house is clean (minus laundry, bathrooms, vacuuming and mopping) but so much more needs done.  I don't have time.  I don't have energy.  I don't know what more to do.

I hate this stress of never being enough, never doing enough.  My hardest and best just isn't enough right now.

Monday, May 7, 2012

Joys at the Dentist

Root Canals suck.  Having one that never ends is what gives root canals the bad name.  I have one of those!  My dentist told me today mine is the type that give root canals the bad name :(  Seriously, I have LONG roots (23-25 mm when most are 17 mm, 20 mm if long) and then all my roots are narrow. 

Makes it super fun :(

I am not loving this.

I have spent 2.5 hours in the chair and have at least another hour.

The only upside to all this is we are double dental insured and our dentist is good price wise so all these hours in the chair wont cost me more than $300 for root canal and the crown that will come in the following months.  Even better - I can use my flex spending so I actually can afford this.  Guess I can say I am blessed.