I am exhausted and can't go to bed.
Why you ask?
The house needs cleaned?
Nope, that's not it. Well yes it does. It always does but that is not new.
I have lots on my mind?
Nope, that's not it. I do but I always do.
The honest truth is...the thought of going and climbing in bed makes my heart race and I have to think and think quickly of something, anything else. I find an excuse. A show I need to catch up on. I need to quickly pay this bill or that. I need to check my emails. The laundry needs folded. ANYTHING. Any excuse works but the reality is I have bedtime anxiety.
I love curling in up next to my hubby in bed. I love snuggling. I love sleeping. Hello if you know me you know I have no aversion to napping or sleeping at night; however, lately, I do!
HELP!! And this is a serious cry for HELP. I don't know what to do anymore. I am tired. I want to go to bed. When Ben says, "Let's go to bed, I am exhausted" my heart starts to pound and my body clenches. If I say, "It's bedtime, let's go to bed dear" to Ben, my heart starts to pound and my body clenches. When ANYONE mentions bedtime or sleeping my heart races.
If I force myself to go lay down the feeling gets worse and worse and worse until I literally can't lay there anymore because I feel so claustrophobic and trapped I have to get up. Sometimes I literally JUMP out of bed because it is so stressful.
WHY THE HECK IS MY BODY DOING THIS? What can I do to stop it? I thought maybe it was my iron, so I stopped taking the iron. Nope - been a couple weeks and STILL struggling to sleep. Yes I know stopping the iron wasn't the best considering everything but I had to think of something. I actually cut out any and EVERY medicine for a couple weeks hoping it would/could be one of them. If it was...the drug must take over 2 weeks to leave your system!
No, I don't drink caffeine beverages so it's not just cutting those out.
Even the thought of going to bed right now sends me into a panic attack in which I have to force myself to breath.
I am really at a loss of what I can and should do. I have run out of options and now its just getting worse cause Ben thinks I just don't want to go to bed with him. It has NOTHING to do with that! Stressing the anxiety of bed does not help bring on sleepiness, just makes the anxiety worse!
I have tried sleeping pills and honestly the anxiety trumps those!
Has anyone even HEARD of this before? What is the cause? I know I am not going to find a solution until I find the root but I just can't seem to pin down why no matter what night it is and what I do or don't have going the next day why I ALWAYS have extreme anxiety at the thought of going to bed.
Thanks and XOXO in advance for any help or suggestions.
Anxiously Awaiting SLEEP!!!