Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Yep, once again I am a Debbie Downer - don't they have a pill to fix that?

I have a MASSIVE sinus infection. Anything touching my face around my sinuses makes me want to cry. There is so much pressure I think my head is going to explode and about right now that actually sounds like it would feel better than what I am currently dealing with. I am seriously suffering from vertigo because I can't balance anything do to so much congestion.

Sudafed, mucinex, Advil Sinus, Tylenol Sinus - all have failed me.

I want to cry but the thought of MORE congestion makes me cringe to even think about.

Top all this lovely happy feeling of goodness with the fact that I am really struggling with depression...let's just say I haven't been good company for anyone.

Poor Ben - pray for him and his patience cause he has needed it!

I had hoped that money would be ok once he started his job. I was wrong...it isn't going to be an instant fix. I knew that deep down, I had just hoped it wouldn't be that way. Even with keeping Christmas meager, we are so strapped I have no clue how all our bills will get paid, we will have gas money and food in the house. Food is already dwindling fast.

As you can see, I am just a ray of sunshine in all aspects right now. I can honestly say right now I am not happy with my life. I hate that I have been sick NON-STOP for the last year. I hate that I have to have surgery to fix my sinus issue. I hate that I have no money to see the dr for it much less have the surgery!

I want to climb in bed and stay there indefinitely. Unfortunately, I am too dang busy to even eat a breakfast or lunch much less actually get a nap in.

Oh and I am going to ask the principal to remove Katy from her class and put her in a different one. Add that to my happy list and it is a million miles long. Katy's teacher has written her off as a failure. She has sent home SEVERAL papers with completely failing grades on them lately. She doesn't ask for a signature or for me to even look at them. I have looked at them and upon closer inspection found that instead of 33% or 40% she isn't getting the problems wrong that are marked wrong and she is truly getting 80-90%. When I approached her teacher about it I was told, "Well I didn't grade them". Ya well you more than gladly put them in your book and didn't think a second thing about it. If I saw a child getting a 33% a test and I were the teacher you better believe as I entered that grade into the book I would look over that test and think, "Why"? Not her teacher - she has come to "expect" that from Katy and that is wrong. Katy can and DOES get better grades than that and I won't accept her writing Katy off.

So much going on and I don't have 20 seconds to myself. I am not loving life. Maybe I need meds cause seriously I am trying but I can't see the good, positive, or happiness.

As for my weight - as of today 138. Not amazing but could be worse.

1 comment:

  1. I ♥ you. I am so sorry you are dealing with so much. Being a working mom sucks, I agree. I know we have seen like, ZIP of each other lately but you are never far from my thoughts and prayers!